"We Used to Be Tenderly Concerned Among Our Families": Compassion for One's Household

Occasion: Transcription of a Fajr khatira delivered on 13 January 2026 Source: A transcription of a video khatira by Dr. Ahmed Abouseif — [Watch the original video on YouTube](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IP9B-4zj7vc)

Al-Ṭūr: The Mountain That Protects Life

When you consider the meaning of the term "al-Ṭūr" and regard it as a strong mountain by which the earth is held firm, it occurs to you that the content of the surah is something that protects people's lives from collapse, just as mountains protect the earth from dissolving and vanishing. So what came in the surah?

Glad Tidings for the People of Obedience

There came very great glad tidings for the people of obedience, taqwā and faith: that the God-fearing are in gardens and bliss. Allah, blessed and exalted, tells them this and gives them the good news that they will have in them whatever they desire, that they will be on couches arranged in rows, and that Allah will marry them to wide-eyed houris, and so on as is mentioned. So what did they do for this life in the Hereafter to be guaranteed to them? And what was their distinguishing mark, and what were their qualities, that they reached this great station?

The Lord of the worlds, glorified is He, shows us what they did through a dialogue among them: they turn to one another asking, what brought you here? So it is as though they are asking one another: what led you to this?

﴿إِنَّا كُنَّا قَبْلُ فِي أَهْلِنَا مُشْفِقِينَ﴾

And the answer was very simple, utterly far from all the expected possibilities. They did not say: we used to affirm the oneness of Allah, nor: we used to strive in such and such; rather they said: ﴿إِنَّا كُنَّا قَبْلُ فِي أَهْلِنَا مُشْفِقِينَ﴾ ("Indeed, we used to be, among our families before, anxious")^[1].

And I look at the term ishfāq (tender concern): does ishfāq deal with minds or with hearts? When I feel tender concern for a person, I am not dealing with his mind, his way of thinking, or his style of managing life, things and money; rather I am dealing with a heart I see as broken — I do not want to say that, but I feel tender concern for him in the sense that I love him and love good for him, and I want what has gone wrong in his hands to be put right for him.

So it is as though the Lord of Might, glorified is He, is telling me that homes are not built on rational discussions and logical debates, but on the foundation of the relationship of hearts between people. And when the Lord of the worlds spoke about the matter of marriage He said: ﴿وَمِنْ آيَاتِهِ أَنْ خَلَقَ لَكُمْ مِنْ أَنْفُسِكُمْ أَزْوَاجًا لِتَسْكُنُوا إِلَيْهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيْنَكُمْ مَوَدَّةً وَرَحْمَةً﴾ ("And among His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in them, and He placed between you affection and mercy")^[2]. He did not speak of rational logic, nor of verbal debate, nor of holding people to account for their actions, nor of prejudgments made before conduct, nor of the mental bigotry that happens with one person and not with others.

To Revolve Around Your Family With Your Heart

And we are speaking of tender concern for the family specifically: ﴿إِنَّا كُنَّا قَبْلُ فِي أَهْلِنَا مُشْفِقِينَ﴾. So it is as though the Lord of the worlds is telling me that I must immerse myself in these souls and these frameworks. Before you become angry with someone in your household, try to feel what he is in, and to sense the pains he is going through, and the level of his feeling about his life and its fluctuations and how things develop in his hands, so that you may do well in showing tender concern in him, for him, with him and around him. For your heart must revolve around these individuals and take them in very fully before you issue any judgments.

And our Lord, glorified is He, speaks to me in this surah of three very important concepts: the first is the concept of creed, the second is the concept of the family, and the third is the concept of respectful, refined rational discussion on which people's movement and their future are built.

The Supplication

So I ask Allah, blessed and exalted, to prepare for us tranquil homes, to grant us a good abode in our homes, to gather for us what the days have scattered and what Satan has stirred up, and in this we ask Allah, glorified is He, to make us firm with the firm word in the life of this world and in the Hereafter. O Allah, amen, O Lord of the worlds.

O Allah, we ask You for every oppressed person on earth wide mercy from You, abundant generosity and complete gentleness. O Allah, we ask You for Your pleasure and Paradise, and we seek refuge in You from Your wrath and the Fire.

--- ^[1]: Editor's documentation: Sūrat al-Ṭūr, verse 26. His words "the God-fearing are in gardens and bliss" refer to verse 17 of the same surah. ^[2]: Editor's documentation: Sūrat al-Rūm, verse 21.