Reflections on Sūrat Yūsuf: Yaʿqūb's Trial with His Sons and His Patience

Occasion: Transcription of a tahajjud khatira delivered in Ramadan 1442 AH, on May 12, 2021 Source: A transcription of a video khatira by Dr. Ahmed Abouseif — Watch the original video on YouTube

I do not know where to begin when I speak about Sūrat Yūsuf, upon him be peace, but glory be to the All-Creating, the All-Knowing. This sūrah can be given very many titles. You can say it is the sūrah of the family, you can call it the sūrah of the divine decrees, the sūrah of planning or strategic knowledge, the sūrah of the call to Allah, the sūrah of patience, the sūrah of seeking reward with Allah. These are all meanings, and there are many others, that fall under the various titles of this blessed sūrah.

A Man Tried Through His Children

If you want to speak about Yaʿqūb, you are speaking about a man tried through his children: some of them disobeyed his command or plotted against him, and some of them he lost without a promised time for the loss and without any expectation of it. You are speaking about this excessive pain from which he suffered greatly until his eyes turned white with grief, and he was suppressing it. And you can speak about his hope, which never went out: ﴿فَصَبْرٌ جَمِيلٌ وَاللَّهُ الْمُسْتَعَانُ عَلَىٰ مَا تَصِفُونَ﴾ (“So patience is most fitting. And Allah is the one sought for help against what you describe”), ﴿عَسَى اللَّهُ أَنْ يَأْتِيَنِي بِهِمْ جَمِيعًا﴾ (“Perhaps Allah will bring them to me all together”), ﴿إِنِّي لَأَجِدُ رِيحَ يُوسُفَ﴾ (“Indeed, I find the smell of Joseph”)^[1]. This hope blazing in the soul of a man who knew from Allah, Blessed and Exalted, His promise and His warning.

The Brothers: Ill Opinion and Violence That Precedes Speech

And if you want to speak about those youths who thought ill of their father: ﴿لَيُوسُفُ وَأَخُوهُ أَحَبُّ إِلَىٰ أَبِينَا﴾ (“Joseph and his brother are more beloved to our father”)^[2], who said that? This is not the measure of love for a moderate, disciplined father who seeks reward with Allah, and it is not the balance of love for a father who raises his children well. A father loves all his children equally. One of them may be closer to his heart than the rest; he likes to talk with him, understands him more, his manners are broad, his heart is open, he listens to his father more than the other does. But the love is shared, and there is never any distinction in the heart of a sensible father.

These youths, whose way of acting always lacked good opinion and good judgment, and the violence that comes before speech, dialogue and address, had as their means scheming and evasion. All they did was to say: ﴿اقْتُلُوا يُوسُفَ﴾ (“Kill Joseph”)^[3], they had no middle solution! Then one of them said: ﴿لَا تَقْتُلُوا يُوسُفَ وَأَلْقُوهُ فِي غَيَابَتِ الْجُبِّ يَلْتَقِطْهُ بَعْضُ السَّيَّارَةِ إِنْ كُنْتُمْ فَاعِلِينَ﴾ (“Do not kill Joseph but throw him into the bottom of the well; some travelers will pick him up – if you would do [something]”). Their state is always impulsiveness and reacting to the event in an exaggerated way.

And if you want to speak about them, speak about them when they forget their first crimes and imagine that what they lied about is the truth. We stopped at their words: ﴿إِنْ يَسْرِقْ فَقَدْ سَرَقَ أَخٌ لَهُ مِنْ قَبْلُ﴾ (“If he steals – a brother of his has stolen before”)^[4]. None of that happened; it was a fabricated tale of their own weaving, but the speaker believed himself until he imagined that this was the truth.

And if you want to speak about them, speak about this rancor, and this envy that filled their hearts until they said: ﴿تَاللَّهِ لَقَدْ آثَرَكَ اللَّهُ عَلَيْنَا وَإِنْ كُنَّا لَخَاطِئِينَ﴾ (“By Allah, certainly has Allah preferred you over us, and indeed, we have been sinners”)^[5]. I wonder: sinners as an admission of guilt, or erring in judgment? That is: we erred in judgment and reckoning? Erring in what exactly?

Yūsuf: Good Opinion in the Most Severe Situations

But you are dealing with the other party, who holds a good opinion all along the way, even at the times of seeing the plot itself: ﴿وَأَوْحَيْنَا إِلَيْهِ لَتُنَبِّئَنَّهُمْ بِأَمْرِهِمْ هَٰذَا وَهُمْ لَا يَشْعُرُونَ﴾ (“And We revealed to him, ‘You will surely inform them [someday] about this affair of theirs while they do not perceive [your identity]’”)^[6]. Allah revealed to Yūsuf, upon him be peace, that you will inform them of this deed and remind them of it one day, according to the interpretation of some of the people of knowledge. But when the moment came he said: ﴿لَا تَثْرِيبَ عَلَيْكُمُ الْيَوْمَ يَغْفِرُ اللَّهُ لَكُمْ﴾ (“No blame will there be upon you today. Allah will forgive you”)^[7], so he did not remind them of what they had done, but carried good opinion.

And when matters grew intense, and there was a very decisive moment from which we can emerge only through good opinion, he said: ﴿يَا أَبَتِ هَٰذَا تَأْوِيلُ رُؤْيَايَ مِنْ قَبْلُ قَدْ جَعَلَهَا رَبِّي حَقًّا وَقَدْ أَحْسَنَ بِي إِذْ أَخْرَجَنِي مِنَ السِّجْنِ﴾ (“O my father, this is the explanation of my vision of before. My Lord has made it reality. And He was certainly good to me when He took me out of prison”)^[8]. Fine, did He not also bring him out of the well? He did not mention the matter. He does not want to renew the pains in his father's soul, and at the same time he does not want to reproach his brothers for what they did, so he said: ﴿مِنْ بَعْدِ أَنْ نَزَغَ الشَّيْطَانُ بَيْنِي وَبَيْنَ إِخْوَتِي﴾ (“after Satan had induced [estrangement] between me and my brothers”). The fault here and the error lie with Satan! As though he is clearing them of the charge they had actually committed. So if you want to reproach, reproach Satan. Or that may be out of courtesy in the presence of his father, since his father had said to him before: ﴿لَا تَقْصُصْ رُؤْيَاكَ عَلَىٰ إِخْوَتِكَ﴾ (“Do not relate your vision to your brothers”); so even if evil came from them, it is not from them but from Satan.

So we learn, at the outset, that whatever disputes arise between people: "May Allah curse Satan," the well-known phrase on the tongues of our brothers from the Levant; as though Satan is in truth the doer and people are tools in his hands. So you see that Allah the Almighty teaches us very many, very great lessons in this Qur'anic context.

The Context of Upbringing with Yaʿqūb, Peace Be upon Him

But come with us and let us look at the context of upbringing with Yaʿqūb, peace be upon him.

First: a shared, agreed dialogue between father and son. We read: ﴿إِذْ قَالَ يُوسُفُ لِأَبِيهِ يَا أَبَتِ﴾ (“[Of these stories mention] when Joseph said to his father, ‘O my father’”)^[9]. And "idh" (when) conveys that it was established, that is, this is a state that actually occurred and not something rare; we are accustomed to conversation between a son and his father. And the word "yā abati" (O my father) conveys a kind of ease in the relationship, a kind of harmony in the dialogue, a kind of psychological compatibility between the two parties. You know this when your son pampers you and speaks to you tenderly and says sweet words to you. And this is the case with Ibrāhīm and Ismāʿīl: ﴿يَا أَبَتِ افْعَلْ مَا تُؤْمَرُ﴾ (“O my father, do as you are commanded”)^[10], and Ibrāhīm before that speaks to his father as is related in Sūrat Maryam. So these dialogues were out of affection and closeness, and conveyed harmony in the relationship between the two parties, which indicates that there was a continuous, connected dialogue between them.

And this is the first point in upbringing: as long as you talk with your children, and as long as they confide their secrets to you, and you do not scold them merely for speaking, and they do not withhold their news from you... how dear to you it is that they talk with you, pour out their hearts in your presence, chat with you, ask you, consult you! For if the vessel is turned upside down while it is full, it must be emptied, so where does it empty? Either it empties with his friends, who give him their experiences from what they have learned and from what they hold as their creed, so different cultures are carried into your home that we have no need of. Imagine your son talking with his friend about feelings inside him toward a girl, for example; if he talks to you, you will tell him this is lawful and this is forbidden, and you teach him with the utmost ease, but if he talked with his friend at school, that is something quite natural for him! So how would the counsel be? Or a girl who does not talk to you, so she empties what she has with a boy who sits next to her in class or accompanies her in study or elsewhere, and she goes beyond the bounds of the usual or the reasonable.

Second: giving reasons in phrasing the command and the prohibition. He said: "My son, do not relate your vision to your brothers," so you must give reasons for what you say. If you say to the boy "do this" and "don't do that" as a direct command, he will listen to your words once, twice and three times, and because he is not convinced he will begin to hide things from you and do things behind your back. And children are able to hide what is in their hands in a way we cannot notice; the technology in their hands makes them do things that we cannot reach in many cases. So the only door to the righteousness of children in our lives is frankness and clarity.

And at some times we find ourselves needing to say to the children: "Please do this and don't ask me." But in order to say that, you must have a prior record. I, for example, have children, especially girls, and I say to them: Please do not do such-and-such. Why? Excuse me, for my sake, I am not comfortable. For merely saying: I am not comfortable with what you are going to do, or with the outing we are going on, or with what we will buy, or: Let's not now, please, this is an emotional aspect of appeasing the child, and by such phrasing the emotional side covers the rational side in his conviction, so he does not ask you for a justification and does not doubt the words he hears from us. For merely saying to him: Excuse me, for my sake, bear with me a little, be patient with me, the emotional side covers the rational, and the matter passes in peace.

And there is no objection, from time to time, to mentioning a story of people who disobeyed their fathers or mothers and fell into something prohibited, or to saying: The possibilities of the earlier experience in my life, and I have been through it before you, benefited in such-and-such ways. I trust you and know that you will not do that, but we do not fear you, we fear for you, and we fear the others. And we say to the girls: I trust you one hundred percent, but let us look at the other party who lies in wait until he reaches what he wants. For the relations between boys and girls in classes and study and gatherings and school offices are supposed to be visible relations and the matters clear; so you say to the boy, or to the girl in particular: Because we are boys and men, we know the moves of boys; he stays very calm and gentle until he gains a hold, and his means of gaining a hold is to come in smooth, a "gentleman," until he reaches his aim. So you explain and talk and detail and clarify and converse, until, when the conversation reaches a stage of trust, you can exchange news with ease and simplicity, and there is no longer any kind of affectation among you.

Third: calculated caution. The other matter among the educational dimensions with Yaʿqūb, upon our Prophet and upon him be prayers and peace, is that he said to his son: Do not relate your vision to your brothers ﴿فَيَكِيدُوا لَكَ كَيْدًا﴾ (“lest they contrive against you a plan”). And the word "kaydan" (a plan) here is indefinite, and the indefinite conveys generality. We do not want to bring the matter to the level of a calamity in the mind of the small child, so we say to him: My son, we want to protect you from any harm, even a slight one, out of being on the safe side. And this is taking precaution and being cautious, which we call in legislation "blocking the means." Our farmers say: The door from which the wind comes to you, shut it and rest.

But the fear that we plant in our children's hearts makes them die of fear and be wary of dealing with society, and this results in a kind of repression in their souls or frustration, so he cannot act, and he becomes a repressed, withdrawn boy who does not know how to deal with society. But Yaʿqūb avoided this point when he said to his son: ﴿وَكَذَٰلِكَ يَجْتَبِيكَ رَبُّكَ وَيُعَلِّمُكَ مِنْ تَأْوِيلِ الْأَحَادِيثِ وَيُتِمُّ نِعْمَتَهُ عَلَيْكَ﴾ (“And thus will your Lord choose you and teach you from the interpretation of narratives and complete His favor upon you”)^[11]. Allahu akbar! It is as though he said to him: If you are taking your precaution on this side, then open your eye on that side, so hope on that side; if you are taking your precaution here, then open your heart and your mind here. So the equation was balanced with Yaʿqūb in his raising of his son, between teaching him to take precaution and pushing him on to drink from the sciences as much as he can, and even sketching before him all the features of the future.

How is that? He said to him: ﴿وَكَذَٰلِكَ يَجْتَبِيكَ رَبُّكَ﴾ (“And thus will your Lord choose you”). What does ijtibāʾ mean? He chooses. Imagine that the lot and the choice will fall upon you, so you are always ready. Our brothers in this country, the one who wants to buy a house after five years preserves his "credit history" from now; no lying and no cheating and no forgery, so that his record stays clean. So with whom is the record to be clean? With our Lord. So imagine how Yaʿqūb planted in the soul of his son the spirit of watchfulness of Allah, Blessed and Exalted, through this sentence: ﴿يَجْتَبِيكَ﴾ (“He will choose you”).

Then he said: ﴿رَبُّكَ﴾ (“your Lord”). Is He his Lord alone? Do we not grasp that He is our Lord, all of us? So why did he say "your Lord," you alone? Because he wants to instill in him self-monitoring: we will not cover for one another. Do you remember our master the Prophet ﷺ when he mentioned Fāṭima, daughter of Muḥammad, and that if she stole he would apply the penalty upon her?^[12] We have no favoritism. And we do not say: Allah will overlook it for her and forgive you because you are the son of the Prophet. No, "your Lord," so he creates in him the spirit of self-monitoring.

A Digression on Loud and Silent Recitation in the Prayer

And you picture, regarding the matter of the prayer, when we pray ʿIshāʾ, for example, two rakʿas aloud and the last two rakʿas silently: what is the story? Why, my dear sir, is it not either all silent or all aloud? And I was told about this that in the first half of the prayer you have a collective feeling that accumulates inside the soul until the middle of the prayer, then we sit for the tashahhud and rise for the last two rakʿas, and you are, naturally, prepared for direct dialogue with Allah. So it is as though in the first two rakʿas I "recharge," we recharge our souls; we have come from outside so we put the plug in the charger, and we recite the Qur'an and say al-ḥamdu lillāh in a loud voice, until, when the two rakʿas are over and we rise for the last two, we work on self-ignition, and you run on your own. And he says, or I think, and Allah the Almighty knows best, that during the last two rakʿas the impression of what was grounded in the first two rakʿas issues forth: what you noticed and heard and absorbed and understood during the first two rakʿas, you translate with yourself in the last two rakʿas. So I learned in the first two rakʿas: ﴿وَكَذَٰلِكَ يَجْتَبِيكَ رَبُّكَ﴾ (“And thus will your Lord choose you”), so in the last two rakʿas I translate: Can I or can't I? It happens or it doesn't happen.

So when he said to him "your Lord," he wanted to plant in him the value of self-monitoring, so that if he was alone one day, his Lord was with him, and he would not step outside the frame of the feeling of self-monitoring even if the homelands drew far from him. And that is what actually happened.

The Completion of Favor and the Bonding of the Family

Then he said: ﴿وَيُتِمُّ نِعْمَتَهُ عَلَيْكَ﴾ (“and complete His favor upon you”). And completion is a full, undiminished fulfillment, so that if the boy is exposed to an accident or a problem he does not doubt the power of Allah, does not imagine that his share is deficient, and does not think about the matter differently, but asks: What will I learn from this hard experience? And he says to you: The blow that does not kill you makes you stronger. This is how the sensible regard the blow that does not make you die: it strengthens your back. And so he said to him: ﴿وَكَذَٰلِكَ يَجْتَبِيكَ رَبُّكَ وَيُعَلِّمُكَ مِنْ تَأْوِيلِ الْأَحَادِيثِ وَيُتِمُّ نِعْمَتَهُ عَلَيْكَ﴾, so the servant remains conscious of the completeness of the favor of Allah, the Mighty and Majestic, upon him, and what he receives in all his life he regards as part of the completeness of favor, not of its deficiency.

﴿وَعَلَىٰ آلِ يَعْقُوبَ﴾ (“and upon the family of Jacob”): problems will occur for us, so beware, shortly, of beating and plots and the like. It is as though he does not want the consideration of brotherhood with his brothers to leave his mind, even if evil came from them. The family of Yaʿqūb: he wants to bind him with the rope of the whole family. So if my brother does something to me in some situation or angers me in some matter, or we disagree over some property or quarrel over some issue, that does not mean I step outside the frame of this bond: ﴿وَعَلَىٰ آلِ يَعْقُوبَ﴾; you will not be able to leave the family of Yaʿqūb, nor will they leave you, so whatever happens among you, the bond stays connected.

And the Lord of Might, glory be to Him, the Almighty, said: ﴿كَمَا أَتَمَّهَا عَلَىٰ أَبَوَيْكَ مِنْ قَبْلُ إِبْرَاهِيمَ وَإِسْحَاقَ﴾ (“as He completed it upon your fathers before, Abraham and Isaac”). Was Ibrāhīm's life sound, with no problems in it? It was full of problems, but the problems that face the caller to Allah are gifts to him, because through them he proves to creation his worthiness to convey the message, and his station is raised in the presence of the One who sent him. So all the problems we face in life make you harder and stronger.

Indeed Your Lord Is Knowing and Wise

﴿إِنَّ رَبَّكَ عَلِيمٌ حَكِيمٌ﴾ (“Indeed, your Lord is Knowing and Wise”). Why did he say "Knowing"? Because he wants to teach him that nothing will happen to him in his life except that Allah, Blessed and Exalted, knows it. By Allah the Magnificent, besides Whom there is no god, this word in itself makes the servant reassured at all times about everything that happens to him, because nothing happens to you in life except with the knowledge of Allah, glory be to Him, the Almighty.

And if we imagine that this place is surrounded by cameras from every side, inside and outside, even if the doors are open, you are now being watched, and at any strange movement the police are called immediately, and the police here arrive in three seconds, so even if someone were threatening from the far end of the place, he would not have time to carry out anything to harm you. So you would be reassured. This is the certainty of the believers: that nothing happens to him in reality except after the knowledge of Allah; Allah, glory be to Him, sees and knows, so He will not let anything happen to you except that in it is your benefit.

And here comes the matter of wisdom: not everything the servant is exposed to is beneficial to him and gladdening to him in its outward appearance. Sometimes painful things come to us, a calamity or a problem, we are exposed to life in some way, so do we sit and weep? He says to you: Do not weep, because what came to you of what pains you is part of the wisdom of Allah. And He, glory be to Him, sees and knows: ﴿إِنَّ رَبَّكَ عَلِيمٌ حَكِيمٌ﴾.

We have many lessons; we do not want to elaborate further than this. I ask Allah, Blessed and Exalted, to grant us good benefit from what is in our hands, to make us and you content, and to teach us and you, O Allah, amen. May Allah reward you with good and may Allah the Almighty be pleased with you, and this is the completion of the tahajjud, by the grace of Allah, Blessed and Exalted, in these blessed days and nights.

The Supplication

O Allah, we ask You to accept our deeds from us and not to reject them upon us, nor any part of them, and to grant us sincerity in what we say and do. O Allah, make our intentions sound for You, purify our hearts for You, and fill our chests with certainty in what is with You and what is in Your hand, O Lord of the worlds. O Allah, we ask You for pardon and well-being in religion, in this world and in the Hereafter, and make us among Your sincere servants. Preserve for us our taqwā, preserve for us the faith You have deposited in our hearts, do not let our hearts deviate after You have guided us, have mercy on our weakness, and overlook our slips, O Lord of the worlds. We ask You, our Lord, by Your mercy, to make this night a witness for us in Your presence on the Day of Resurrection, and to place it in the scale of our good deeds, O Lord of the worlds. O Allah, make our deeds an intercessor for us in Your presence, and make our supplication for our parents, our families, our spouses, our brothers and sisters and our children a provision for them in Your presence, O Lord of the worlds. We ask Allah, Blessed and Exalted, to treat our families with kindness, and to have mercy on our brothers who are being attacked in Palestine. O Allah, make them steadfast and help them; O Allah, do not disgrace them and do not forsake them; O Allah, be for them and not against them, O Lord of the worlds. O Allah, teach them how to seek Your favor, how to stand at Your door, and how to make supplication to You well, so that You answer their supplication and fulfill their request, through Your mercy, O Lord of the worlds. And may Allah send prayers and peace upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon his family and Companions, with abundant peace. May Allah the Almighty reward you with good for having been a help to us in obedience to Allah, and I ask Allah to give you your rewards in full, and the peace, mercy and blessings of Allah be upon you.

--- ^[1]: Editor's documentation: Yūsuf: 18, 83, 84, 94. The body is limited to the portion of the last verse that the speaker uttered. ^[2]: Editor's documentation: Yūsuf: 8, and its completion is ﴿مِنَّا﴾ (“than us”); the speaker cited it in summary, and it has been set down in the wording of the verse. ^[3]: Editor's documentation: Yūsuf: 9, 10. ^[4]: Editor's documentation: Yūsuf: 77. ^[5]: Editor's documentation: Yūsuf: 91. ^[6]: Editor's documentation: Yūsuf: 15. ^[7]: Editor's documentation: Yūsuf: 92. ^[8]: Editor's documentation: Yūsuf: 100. ^[9]: Editor's documentation: Yūsuf: 4. ^[10]: Editor's documentation: al-Ṣāffāt: 102; and Ibrāhīm's dialogue with his father is in Maryam: 42 and following. ^[11]: Editor's documentation: Yūsuf: 5, 6; and the completion of the verse: «كَمَا أَتَمَّهَا عَلَىٰ أَبَوَيْكَ مِنْ قَبْلُ إِبْرَاهِيمَ وَإِسْحَاقَ إِنَّ رَبَّكَ عَلِيمٌ حَكِيمٌ» (“as He completed it upon your fathers before, Abraham and Isaac. Indeed, your Lord is Knowing and Wise”). ^[12]: Editor's documentation: The ḥadīth is conveyed by meaning by the speaker; its origin is in the two Ṣaḥīḥs in the story of the Makhzūmī woman, and there is no quotation of the text of the ḥadīth in the body.